I was reflecting on our last project over the weekend, and I realized I never said thank you.This is because you are trying to take in the other person’s words while also interpreting their intentions, especially if the compliment arrives late or catches you off guard.Īs the person giving thanks, you can put the recipient at ease by sharing the context of your message (or what prompted you to approach them) first. If you’ve ever been surprised by a compliment, then you know that it can feel good - and simultaneously jarring. Still, you need to be thoughtful with your words if you want to come across as genuine. If you have any other agenda, your message will not be authentic. The goal of expressing appreciation is to let someone know how their actions have impacted you and/or others. Rules for Crafting a Meaningful Thank-You Note Keep it genuine. There are a few simple rules you can follow to make sure your efforts are taken to heart (and not negatively misinterpreted). One method I’ve found useful for overcoming them is starting small, with a simple thank-you note. While these fears are valid, they can also stop us from experiencing the long list of rewards gratitude has to offer. Others struggle to find the right words to express what they feel, or they worry that their remarks might be seen as kissing up or as masking a hidden agenda. Some people want to express appreciation more often but fear that their efforts will be misinterpreted or make the person on the receiving end uncomfortable. I’ve seen this time and again through my work training leaders in the art of recognition and engagement. The problem is that many of us hold fears around expressing our thanks to others. When we give or experience thanks daily, we strengthen these neural pathways. Dopamine and serotonin are two neurotransmitters responsible for immediately uplifting our moods. The many benefits of gratitude may be explained by the feel-good chemicals released in our brains upon expressing or receiving it.

Another study found that receiving more frequent appreciation from our colleagues and managers doesn’t only make us feel respected, it’s also linked to better performance. Whether you’ve accepted a task while your plate is already full, worked through weekends to get a project off the ground, or simply been there for a work friend when they needed your support, an acknowledgement or “thank you” can go a long way in making us feel good about the efforts we put in - and the research supports this.Ī recent study from McKinsey & Company found that although most employers believe that the large number of people who quit their jobs this year were looking for better compensation, most were leaving because they didn’t feel valued and lacked a sense of belonging at work.

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